Oh Crap I've Got Shingles (I thought you had to be old)

So last night I was getting these weird hot flashes and I was having a bizarre waking dream that I was in the show, Merlin. (I love that show). I didn't realize I was sick, I just thought I was hot because Camelot was hot. But then I got up and turned the AC down, get this...so the kids wouldn't be too hot in Camelot (I was out of it). About a half hour later I felt fine, but not sleepy. At that point (about 1am by now) I felt something itchy on my breast and it felt like a bug bite or something but then I realized it was bigger than a bug bite. I got out of bed and went into the bathroom to check it out in the mirror. I was dismayed to see I had an awful rash on there...itchy red bumps. So for the rest of the nights feeding with Emmy I made sure the rash was covered with my T-shirt so her lips didn't touch the affected area.

This morning I felt fine but the rash looked so soft and lumpy and disturbing that I called my dermatologist and made an appointment for tomorrow morning at 8am. Then this afternoon I noticed that the rash had spread in a line all around my breast and I got very nervous about nursing Emmy so I called back my dermatolgist and begged them to see me today. They said they weren't a walk in clinic but when I told them I was worried about my 4 month old nursing near the rash, they fit me in this afternoon.

So when the doctor came in and I showed her the rash she backed away and hurried out of the room saying she was going to get another doctor. I thought that was kind of nerve wracking. Then she stuck her head in the room and said the other doctor was coming. She said that she was pregnant and if I had what she thought I had, that was very contageous and horrible for a pregnant woman. Then she left again and my heart was pounding out of my chest.

The next doctor came in and looked at it and said it was shingles.

I said, 'I thought only old people get shingles."

She said, "Anyone who had chicken pox as a child can get it. Doe it hurt?"

"no."

"You are very lucky that it doesn't hurt because it can be very painful."

"No it just itches a bit."

She prescribed me Valtrex and said it would be fine for nursing. I asked if Emmy could get the virus from my breast milk and get chicken pox. She said she would call my pediatrician and find out for sure. A half hour later they told me that the milk was not affected and this is what I needed to do:

1. bandage the blisters well

2. put plastic stuff over the bandages (Tegaderm)

3. pump on the affected breast making sure that no part of the rash touches the plastic of the pump. Pump while she is nursing on the other side.

4. feed her the milk that I pumped.

Now I am home and showered and bandaged up. My boob is wrapped in enough plastic to pack it in a box and ship it off somewhere. I did pump and Emmy finally took a bottle after I tried 2 different kinds. She likes the Born Free bottles and nipples and would only take it sitting on my lap and facing away from me, go figure.

I'm really tired and about to go to bed now. I decided not to take the Valtrex since I am nursing. I gave some of the breast milk that Emmy didn't drink and mixed it with AJ's favorite, chocolate rice milk and gave her a cup. I think that if autism has anything to do with viruses from shots still living in her system, maybe my antibodies fighting the shingles will help her. I'm going to give Owen some too although he isn't vaccinated for chicken pox and I might take him to get vaccinated tomorrow.

They also took a mole off to send away for a biopsy.

I'm off to bed now. I hope it isn't a bad idea not to take the Valtrex.

me.

#3 on the way

So I am 6 weeks pregnant. We used a condom with spermacide, but I guess you have to use it right from the beginning because we are living proof that if you wait a little first, you're gonna get pregnant! I've been a little stunned. The first two were not planned but they were in the plans and it was actually perfect timing. But we were done and I had my head wrapped around that. We were ready for the vacations to begin, maybe camping soon. We were ready for both kids to be in school so I could work during the day more and we could make some more money. But here I am with number 3 growing rapidly in there as I type. Of course I am happy. It is like nature makes you happy. What else are you going to be? Of course I am worried about autism and I am doing things differently this time. I am not going to eat a ton of chocolate for one...no tuna fish at all. I am eating organic healthy food but I will allow the occasional pizza binge. Today, to get myself excited or to drive home the reality, I bought two glass baby bottles online and a stainless steel sippy cup. And I think that I am somehow going to try and not have an epidural. I don't know. I won't commit to that because I got to 9 cm with Owen before I got the epidural and I can still feel the pain. But I think I am going to try.

Also a couple of weeks before my due date and after the baby is born I am not going to eat or consume anything with casein in it as I have read lots of articles that say it helps to calm colic, to cut out dairy. After having one child with autism and the other with first, dysphasia as an infant and asthma now. I am going to do my best to keep the environmental toxins as far away as I can. I also will not be doing any shots until this one is 4 years old. I hope it helps keep my new little one protected. It is so strange because you get the shots to protect your children, and it is so weird that I will not be getting the shots...to protect my children. I have learned that doctors don't know anything and the people who taught the doctors, don't know anything. What else is a doctor going to do though than tell you confidently that what they have learned is fact. How can you be a skeptical doctor? Well, I guess it is possible, in fact we have one for AJ.

So I am early on in the pregnancy but I am giving my little clump of multiplying cells lots of good energy and thoughts and early love. I have been lucky enough that my anxiety has not been popping up and I hope it stays that way. I am wondering if it going to be a boy or girl. AJ wants a sister and Owen wants a brother. I don't care, either way it will be amazing. I hope things work out. I hope I hope and I hope and I don't worry because worry doesn't help. But I am terrified in the most calm way possible. Hm,
me.