This morning I went to see my midwife, Lilly and she said that I was half effaced and a couple centimeters and could easily go another couple of weeks. So to try and make myself feel better I went to the second hand maternity shop to try and get something to tie me over since I am wearing the same two outfits every day...the only two that fit over my belly. I did this after picking up the kids from school and it was a nightmare trying to get them to stay in my sight while trying on clothes in the temporary dressing room then moving to the soon-to-be-new dressing room to look in a mirror. I got pretty depressed at how ridiculous everything looked. Even XL's didn't fit over my belly all the way. The kids were very upset about having to be in the dressing room with me and AJ couldn't keep her hands off my bare belly which was very annoying to me at that time.
I finally ended up buying a new maternity outfit that they cleverly put near all the used stuff. And it was $60, clearly not what I had planned to spend on two shirts and a pair of pants. I wanted to spend $20. But the pants are gloriously comfy and the shirt looks nice. It is black so I don't look quite so moo moo.
Then we went to the park and I sat on a blanket with my friends who met me there while the kids all played. We agreed at the park that this was our favorite thing to do...to sit on a blanket in the sun and chill out while the kids had fun. I feel very lucky to be able to do that. Then when we came home it looked like a bomb had hit the place and I suddenly realized that I was giving up a tidy house for a blanket in the park. The kids needed dinner. The phone rang, it was Tina and she said that she heard that I spend over $1000 month on groceries and that was outrageous and she wanted to help me. She told me that I need to do organic co ops and such. But I was just kind of like, I know it is crazy, but right now we finally know what to buy to keep AJ healthy and happy and out of the fog. We also know what both kids will eat, and it costs us over $1000 a month to do this and keep our sanity. I just don't have the time to make black bean burgers from dried beans, I just don't. In fact the Eden brand black beans are the only cans we buy since they are apparently the only cans that are not line with BPA's. After talking to Tina and feeling like a big fat failure of a mom for not being more efficient in the kitchen, I made some extra black bean burgers for AJ's lunches. I put some in the freezer and felt good that I have an extra protein to pull out of there that isn't a hot dog. Yesterday I made baked meatballs and the kids loved them with their pasta and sauce. But buying meat without hormones in it is very expensive and not something I am going to give up. I have to serve meat since AJ can't have dairy or soy and only like's beans disguised as burgers. We never go on vacation, we rarely buy things at all. We choose to spend our money on healthy food.
Tina did inspire me though to try and find an organic co op around here. There has to be one in this college town. She is like the master of organization, money management and keeps a tight organized and clean ship. She is wonderful to learn from. But I will never be as self disciplined which I think is OK. She does inspire me and I feel like if I ever get up the time, money or inclination to do stuff I want to do, like grow my own blueberry plants and such, then I know I just need to give her a call and she will have the answers in a second.
The baby isn't moving as much now that it is squooshed so tightly in there. I am going to go and have a big glass of ice water with lemon in it to try and get this little one wiggling a bit since I need to do my movement counts and it makes me nervous when it seems a bit quiet in there.
me.
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