Tomorrow, even with my new due date, I will be 37 weeks which is considered full term. So if I went into labor they wouldn't give me drugs to stop it. I have a freakish looking belly and I'm a bit self conscious about what I look like. I pretty much look like Mr. Greedy, but my stomach is even more pointing out like a bullet rather than rounded like most pregnant people. Maybe it is because I am only 5'3" and pretty skinny.  The baby just lives in the front of my belly and sags it down a bit and points out. When I lie down in bed on my side it is like putting the baby next to me on the  bed too because my belly just rests like it is a layer of skin over a baby.

We had another wonderful day with AJ. How many is that now? She is talking and playing and answering and asking questions. Her conversation skills over the past 6 or 7 months have just exploded. She knows how to make sentences now. She knows how to communicate. Of course this is null and void when she is in a fog, but we have had no fog and she has been going to sleep with no melatonin.  I have been very strict about our new bedtime routine and it is working. I am just in shock over the success of the past few days. Tomorrow I will be sure to give her the shot and not forget.

My Mom admitted that seeing me now is a reminder of what should have been with my sister...when I confronted her about it/ discussed it with her on the phone. I feel a bit resentful in a weird way that the fact that I am alive and well, most likely going to have this baby and such...that she should get any pain out of that at all. But I know it is life and you can't help how you feel. I will never be her precious oldest daughter, and I don't want to be. I miss her too. But please don't look at me and be sad.

me.